Hello everyone
I've always been fairly optimistic, you know, things can't get any worse, the glass is always half full. Well they can get worse and my glass, along with my spirit is broken. I appear as a swan, or so I'm told, calm and serene on the surface, but paddling away furiously beneath just to stay afloat.
Last time I told you I was given six months to vacate my flat, well, if only that were still true. Along with my redundancy letter, I was given a new short term lease for the flat. Scanning the page quickly (I was at work) my eyes fell on the third paragraph, written in bold letters was the date 30th April. My stomach fell to my boots, my heart leapt into my mouth and I felt sick. I read the line again. Termination of short term tenancy 30th April.
I couldn't believe what I was reading, surely this couldn't be true; if it was, I had seven weeks left. I spoke to the owner who informed me this was indeed the case, (sorry but I want you out, NOW)
With my head reeling and my coffee threatening to leave my stomach at any second, I carried on with my duties in a daze, drove home at the end of the shift (I'm sure my car has autopilot) as I don't even remember the journey, sat down, cried and then put pen to paper . . . and wrote (I think) the most amazing, emotionally soaked piece of writing I've ever done.
Although it didn't solve my problems, it did make me feel better, (there had to be an outlet for those all those feeling) and I had something at the end of it. So however hopeless a situation seems, try writing it all down in story form, it's amazing how those feelings flood the page, emotions you can't get to unless you are actually experiencing them.
Tuesday, 3 March 2015
Saturday, 14 February 2015
The Best Laid Plans
Hello fellow scribblers
I received some very upsetting news the other day; after ten years with the same company, I am being made redundant, the care home where I work is closing down in six weeks time. But if that wasn't bad enough, (oh yes, it gets worse) I've also been given six months to vacate my home. The flat is rented from the same company as my job, so no job, no home.
I have spent the past week living under a black cloud, numb with shock. The announcement was a complete surprise to everyone, no-one knew it was coming, there were no whispers or comments, nothing.
Needless to say, my writing has taken a back seat, (I had such high hopes for this year) all I'm writing now are CV's and job applications and instead of scouring the web for writing opportunities, I'm desperately house hunting. I feel like a character in a story, my entire world has just come crashing down around me.
Today is valentines day and yes, my romantic interest surprised me with a beautiful silken gothic cushion depicting a raven, a huge box of chocs and a gorgeous card, (by the way, these are the first valentine gifts I have ever received) and while I was over whelmed by them, (I never realised he felt that way) the whole feeling of the day was overshadowed by recent events.
I don't know how things will turn out, my foreseeable future looks rather bleak, but you never know, a year from now I might get a story out of it.
Until next time, I wish you all good luck and ask that you appreciate what you have, as you never know when you could lose it.
I received some very upsetting news the other day; after ten years with the same company, I am being made redundant, the care home where I work is closing down in six weeks time. But if that wasn't bad enough, (oh yes, it gets worse) I've also been given six months to vacate my home. The flat is rented from the same company as my job, so no job, no home.
I have spent the past week living under a black cloud, numb with shock. The announcement was a complete surprise to everyone, no-one knew it was coming, there were no whispers or comments, nothing.
Needless to say, my writing has taken a back seat, (I had such high hopes for this year) all I'm writing now are CV's and job applications and instead of scouring the web for writing opportunities, I'm desperately house hunting. I feel like a character in a story, my entire world has just come crashing down around me.
Today is valentines day and yes, my romantic interest surprised me with a beautiful silken gothic cushion depicting a raven, a huge box of chocs and a gorgeous card, (by the way, these are the first valentine gifts I have ever received) and while I was over whelmed by them, (I never realised he felt that way) the whole feeling of the day was overshadowed by recent events.
I don't know how things will turn out, my foreseeable future looks rather bleak, but you never know, a year from now I might get a story out of it.
Until next time, I wish you all good luck and ask that you appreciate what you have, as you never know when you could lose it.
Thursday, 29 January 2015
Write What You See.
Hello fellow scribblers,
I thought this time you might like to see where my inspiration for the story of the orphanage came from, so for the first time I'm including pictures, (at least I'm going to try) The building itself was called The Babies Castle and was an actual orphanage, before being turned into a care home and then a pile of rubble.
As I've said before, the building was amazing, so atmospheric, no wonder I was inspired. From the crumbling walls and wilderness garden full of forgotten little memories, to a cobweb decorated light switch, blackened bed linen and a long abandoned tinselled tree.
If you put all these ingredients together and have an imagination as weird as mine, you'll be surprised what you can come up with. My story is entitled 'The Last Christmas' and is a ghost story, although not a traditional one.
I am still writing every day,(I haven't missed a single one yet) and have almost finished the second and hopefully final draft of said story. I've also decided to try and write a complete short story every month and submit it, so I've been searching the web for small press and online publications. They don't pay much, sometimes only a contributors copy, but at least it gets my name out there.
My novel is still gathering dust, (the more I read of it, the more unhappy I am with it) Over half way through and I feel it needs, no, deserves a full re-write. I still like the story and find the subject matter interesting, but like my school work always said, 'could do better,' So pen in hand I scribble on. Its still January and I've already written more in three weeks than I did for half of last year and if I can do it, so can you. Happy scribbling.
I thought this time you might like to see where my inspiration for the story of the orphanage came from, so for the first time I'm including pictures, (at least I'm going to try) The building itself was called The Babies Castle and was an actual orphanage, before being turned into a care home and then a pile of rubble.
As I've said before, the building was amazing, so atmospheric, no wonder I was inspired. From the crumbling walls and wilderness garden full of forgotten little memories, to a cobweb decorated light switch, blackened bed linen and a long abandoned tinselled tree.
If you put all these ingredients together and have an imagination as weird as mine, you'll be surprised what you can come up with. My story is entitled 'The Last Christmas' and is a ghost story, although not a traditional one.
I am still writing every day,(I haven't missed a single one yet) and have almost finished the second and hopefully final draft of said story. I've also decided to try and write a complete short story every month and submit it, so I've been searching the web for small press and online publications. They don't pay much, sometimes only a contributors copy, but at least it gets my name out there.
My novel is still gathering dust, (the more I read of it, the more unhappy I am with it) Over half way through and I feel it needs, no, deserves a full re-write. I still like the story and find the subject matter interesting, but like my school work always said, 'could do better,' So pen in hand I scribble on. Its still January and I've already written more in three weeks than I did for half of last year and if I can do it, so can you. Happy scribbling.
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| the babies castle |
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| abandoned |
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| busy spiders |
Thursday, 15 January 2015
Can't See The Wood For The Trees
Hello everyone,
Well, we're two weeks into the new year and so far I've kept my promise, (although it has been tough sometimes) I wrote six sentences the other night at 11.51pm, so determined was I to keep my promise.
Another thing that seems determined to keep me from writing is one of my cats. Whether I'm using a pen and notebook or tapping away on the laptop, she will come and sit on top of them and it's very hard to type with a cat on the keyboard, or chewing the end of your pen. Her ample brother on the other hand, can be much worse, if he sits on the laptop, I can't even see it.
But furry problems aside, I have almost finished the first draft of my orphanage story and finally settled on a title I'm happy with, (but forcing myself to work on only one thing at a time is hard) I've also decided to submit my short stories to writing competitions before they go into my collection as an anthology. So now I'm busy searching the web for any short story horror comps, (well you never know your luck)
I hope to finish the orphanage this week, but then comes another problem, (yes, I'm always looking for potential problems) what to start on next? I've started three other short stories, but which one do I choose? They are all vying for my attention, begging me to finish them.
As for my poor novel, (we've been apart for a long time) Well, I re-read half of it the other day and can already see some obvious flaws. They should be easily fixable, thank God, but maybe that just proves I needed a break from it. As I'd become so close to it, I couldn't see the problems anymore; poor writing, repeated sentences and no flow in some places. . . . .I was ashamed. I could do better, I can do better and I will. But it took the break to realise it.
So a note of warning to anyone who's writing a novel . . . have a break from it. Put it away for a few weeks and ignore it, write something else, just don't touch it and I guarantee that when you do go back to it, you'll see it with different eyes. Good Luck and happy scribbling.
Well, we're two weeks into the new year and so far I've kept my promise, (although it has been tough sometimes) I wrote six sentences the other night at 11.51pm, so determined was I to keep my promise.
Another thing that seems determined to keep me from writing is one of my cats. Whether I'm using a pen and notebook or tapping away on the laptop, she will come and sit on top of them and it's very hard to type with a cat on the keyboard, or chewing the end of your pen. Her ample brother on the other hand, can be much worse, if he sits on the laptop, I can't even see it.
But furry problems aside, I have almost finished the first draft of my orphanage story and finally settled on a title I'm happy with, (but forcing myself to work on only one thing at a time is hard) I've also decided to submit my short stories to writing competitions before they go into my collection as an anthology. So now I'm busy searching the web for any short story horror comps, (well you never know your luck)
I hope to finish the orphanage this week, but then comes another problem, (yes, I'm always looking for potential problems) what to start on next? I've started three other short stories, but which one do I choose? They are all vying for my attention, begging me to finish them.
As for my poor novel, (we've been apart for a long time) Well, I re-read half of it the other day and can already see some obvious flaws. They should be easily fixable, thank God, but maybe that just proves I needed a break from it. As I'd become so close to it, I couldn't see the problems anymore; poor writing, repeated sentences and no flow in some places. . . . .I was ashamed. I could do better, I can do better and I will. But it took the break to realise it.
So a note of warning to anyone who's writing a novel . . . have a break from it. Put it away for a few weeks and ignore it, write something else, just don't touch it and I guarantee that when you do go back to it, you'll see it with different eyes. Good Luck and happy scribbling.
Tuesday, 30 December 2014
New Year, New Promises.
Hello everyone,
As there are only a couple of days left of this year, I've made a few promises to myself; I'm loath to call them resolutions, as that's just inviting failure.
I've promised to write every single day, even if it's just a few lines. I've also promised to finish one thing before I start another, (I have four short stories on the go as well as my novel) I never seem to finish anything lately, even my orphanage story is hanging in limbo, much to the annoyance of my friend, who keeps asking when he can read it and have I finished it yet? I get so excited at the thought of a new story, that I abandon the old ones.
Talking of abandoned, the poor orphanage, (the focus of my short story) is now nothing but a sad, broken pile of bricks.
We drove out to see it the other day, just to say our goodbyes, but unfortunately we were too late, the demolition squad had beaten us to it.
It felt strange standing in the grounds amid mountains of broken bricks. A kind of sadness hung over the area, we both felt it, as if the bricks, absorbing the atmosphere of the home over the years, were slowly dying, needless to say we didn't stay long.
I wanted to take a piece of brick or wood as a keepsake, but didn't have the heart to separate it from its kin, so left empty handed, but with a heart full of memories.
I'm determined to keep my promises, 2015 is going to be a very productive year . . .I promise.
I wish everyone a great new writing year, whether you're a beginner or a professional, good luck to you all and a happy new year.
As there are only a couple of days left of this year, I've made a few promises to myself; I'm loath to call them resolutions, as that's just inviting failure.
I've promised to write every single day, even if it's just a few lines. I've also promised to finish one thing before I start another, (I have four short stories on the go as well as my novel) I never seem to finish anything lately, even my orphanage story is hanging in limbo, much to the annoyance of my friend, who keeps asking when he can read it and have I finished it yet? I get so excited at the thought of a new story, that I abandon the old ones.
Talking of abandoned, the poor orphanage, (the focus of my short story) is now nothing but a sad, broken pile of bricks.
We drove out to see it the other day, just to say our goodbyes, but unfortunately we were too late, the demolition squad had beaten us to it.
It felt strange standing in the grounds amid mountains of broken bricks. A kind of sadness hung over the area, we both felt it, as if the bricks, absorbing the atmosphere of the home over the years, were slowly dying, needless to say we didn't stay long.
I wanted to take a piece of brick or wood as a keepsake, but didn't have the heart to separate it from its kin, so left empty handed, but with a heart full of memories.
I'm determined to keep my promises, 2015 is going to be a very productive year . . .I promise.
I wish everyone a great new writing year, whether you're a beginner or a professional, good luck to you all and a happy new year.
Monday, 8 December 2014
Feel Good Feedback
Hello everyone,
I have just received a lovely, encouraging text from my romantic interest. I started a new story based in the abandoned building of our first date and told him about it,(well he did ask) Anyway, after a lot of badgering and pleading, I finally let him read it, (I'd only written a few pages) and don't like anyone to see them, let alone read them until I'm fully satisfied with them.
Well, he took the printed pages home, read them and text me straight away; this is how the text went....'Hi hunni, you have real talent, I swear your stories could move me to tears, given the time you could really make it, you should quit your day job and write full time.'
If only; I'd love the chance to write full time, who wouldn't? Quit the day job and hit the big time, or sink trying.
That text sent my spirits soaring, I felt elated and so proud. Someone, who doesn't usually read or like fiction, loved my work; if only editors were that appreciative. Needless to say I'm busy writing the rest of the story to see what he thinks of the finished piece, (hope I don't disappoint) which leaves my poor novel gathering a bit more dust.
I know in the great scheme of the writing world, his opinion counts for very little, but to me, those words meant everything. That little text made my day and gave me hope. If one person likes it, maybe others will too, so my ending message to everyone is, never give up hope .....it's all we've got and please, show your work to other people, however nervous you may be.
I have just received a lovely, encouraging text from my romantic interest. I started a new story based in the abandoned building of our first date and told him about it,(well he did ask) Anyway, after a lot of badgering and pleading, I finally let him read it, (I'd only written a few pages) and don't like anyone to see them, let alone read them until I'm fully satisfied with them.
Well, he took the printed pages home, read them and text me straight away; this is how the text went....'Hi hunni, you have real talent, I swear your stories could move me to tears, given the time you could really make it, you should quit your day job and write full time.'
If only; I'd love the chance to write full time, who wouldn't? Quit the day job and hit the big time, or sink trying.
That text sent my spirits soaring, I felt elated and so proud. Someone, who doesn't usually read or like fiction, loved my work; if only editors were that appreciative. Needless to say I'm busy writing the rest of the story to see what he thinks of the finished piece, (hope I don't disappoint) which leaves my poor novel gathering a bit more dust.
I know in the great scheme of the writing world, his opinion counts for very little, but to me, those words meant everything. That little text made my day and gave me hope. If one person likes it, maybe others will too, so my ending message to everyone is, never give up hope .....it's all we've got and please, show your work to other people, however nervous you may be.
Monday, 17 November 2014
Extra Time (to write)
Hello everyone
All appears to be going well, (maybe a little too well) My shifts at work have changed again; I now work mornings only; woo hoo; freeing up the afternoons for writing,(once the courses are out of the way, I'm free to scribble) we now have four to do every month; just as well I don't have much of a social life.
My writing is going well, so far; I've completed another two chapters of my novel and managed to do a lot of vital research, which I must admit, gave me a few nightmares, (the astral plane has some nasty entities floating around) I've also got another three short stories for my collection, only in notes at the moment, if I stopped to write them, I'd never get my novel done, although it is very tempting.
The romance is still going strong,(we don't see each other enough to argue) We went to a reputedly haunted pub out in the middle of nowhere; no houses, no street lights, nothing....just darkness. The pub dates back to the 16 century and although it's said to be very haunted, we neither saw or felt anything, I'm beginning to think we scare the ghosts away.
We also paid a visit to the derelict building of our first date. The place is literally in ruins. The grounds have been stripped of trees and bushes, completely levelled and with all the rain, the grounds are like quick sand, we sank in soggy clay like mud up to our shins, even doc martens didn't protect us. Scaffolding surrounds the main building as the tiles are stripped off the roof for resale and all the little out buildings have gone, reduced to nothing more than rubble; it is truly a sad sight.
I wonder where the ghosts will go when the place has been demolished? Will they still continue to haunt the site? Or will they cease to exist? This poses a question; Where do ghost's go when they are not haunting? Any answers will be greatly appreciated.
Anyway, that's about it for now, my novel beckons; it's sitting on the table in front of me and I can almost hear my main character urging me not to leave her in the predicament I just put her in. I wish all other writers out there good luck with their scribbling.
All appears to be going well, (maybe a little too well) My shifts at work have changed again; I now work mornings only; woo hoo; freeing up the afternoons for writing,(once the courses are out of the way, I'm free to scribble) we now have four to do every month; just as well I don't have much of a social life.
My writing is going well, so far; I've completed another two chapters of my novel and managed to do a lot of vital research, which I must admit, gave me a few nightmares, (the astral plane has some nasty entities floating around) I've also got another three short stories for my collection, only in notes at the moment, if I stopped to write them, I'd never get my novel done, although it is very tempting.
The romance is still going strong,(we don't see each other enough to argue) We went to a reputedly haunted pub out in the middle of nowhere; no houses, no street lights, nothing....just darkness. The pub dates back to the 16 century and although it's said to be very haunted, we neither saw or felt anything, I'm beginning to think we scare the ghosts away.
We also paid a visit to the derelict building of our first date. The place is literally in ruins. The grounds have been stripped of trees and bushes, completely levelled and with all the rain, the grounds are like quick sand, we sank in soggy clay like mud up to our shins, even doc martens didn't protect us. Scaffolding surrounds the main building as the tiles are stripped off the roof for resale and all the little out buildings have gone, reduced to nothing more than rubble; it is truly a sad sight.
I wonder where the ghosts will go when the place has been demolished? Will they still continue to haunt the site? Or will they cease to exist? This poses a question; Where do ghost's go when they are not haunting? Any answers will be greatly appreciated.
Anyway, that's about it for now, my novel beckons; it's sitting on the table in front of me and I can almost hear my main character urging me not to leave her in the predicament I just put her in. I wish all other writers out there good luck with their scribbling.
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